Processes of the Party

As everything in the CP(F) is consistently debated in the dredges of the dankest of basements and community centers by our eloquently factionalist membership, it is important to note that virtually none of our statements nor policies nor communiques are ever beyond draft form, unless posted by renegade sects that attempt a unilateralist policy of publication.

This is also the reason why our weekly newspaper, the Sectarian Worker, has been indefinitely postponed, as well as due to the successful factionalizing of the sniveling cowards that was our editorial board.

Regardless, this new blog will be the resurrection of the Party in public and national form. After the creation of such newly formed Leninist groups as the Communist League, the Free Peoples Movement, the Organization, and others since the CP(F) reached a stagnant stage of dormancy, we have decided that our crusade (yes, crusade, as our General Secretary-Chairman is nothing if not a messianic figure), must continue.

We will speak through those mass movements we operate within, including our anti-war front, er, anti-coalition JUST ANSWER PEACE!, and others. Our various, innumerable, countless factions will also now be given a forum, as will the communiques of our fearless leader-on-high, the ignoble General Secretary-Chairman.

To join us, leave a first name (doesnt have to be real) and a ministry, and prepare for a rigid lifestyle, rife with fractionalism, sectarianism, factionalism (there are nuances between the three), purges, and hopefully someday a return to our most egregious of revolutionary errors: opportunistic quotaed newspaper selling. Those ministries which currently exist and are still known shall also be posted in coming days (or possibly hours), though names in most cases are changed to protect our politboro.

As for our raison d’être, to place a mirror in front of the left in the United States Empire, make it laught at itself, and then let it whimper when it realizes it can never be as factionalistic as we. We have set the precedent for attacking foolosophers and philistines (sorry to the Palestinians offended by the term) who stick to the sectarian dogma that has helped keep the Left marginal. The Left's alleged goals - to correct injustice, fight for democracy, strive for a better society for all- have been successfully cut short thanks to the amazing internal divisionism that has kept it weak. So, as the first party formed specifically to attract agents provocateurs, we say splendid to the Left for doing what the state infiltrators could only dream of doing: making our collective and thoroughly righteous goals incredibly difficult to materialize.

Down with Anarchy, Centralize Authority!